In a world of perpetual change the traditional concept of marriage – constancy, fidelity, familiarity – is an institution completely at odds with the times we live in.

While we still crave the intimacy of stable relationships, escalating divorce rates reveal that we can no longer sustain the old social roles of husband or wife until death do us part. So, what happened? Did we lose our stamina? Has the unbuckling of divorce laws merely shown us for what we are: fickle, cowardly, inept?

In Splitting Up: Divorce, Culture, and the Search for a Real Life Toronto lawyer Larry Frolick concludes divorce is rampant because consumer culture drives us to forge partnerships no longer based on preservation, but on the consumption of goods and services. Such relationships – “mall marriages” – often fail because the couple can no longer find a purpose for their union.

As for modern marrieds disheartened by their great-grandparents’ apparent flair for matrimonial longevity, they should stop comparing the apples and oranges outcome of two dramatically different social cultures. The reasons older generations seem so adept at wedlock, says Frolick, owe more to economics and culture than to a superior capacity for love.

While Frolick makes no bones about his agenda – the book’s primary aim is to sound the alarm on official culture – Splitting Up will not disappoint readers in search of straight-up advice on the nuts and bolts of divorce.

As well, sections on the various species of lawyers, how to prevent a spouse from taking everything, and what to and what not to expect of the legal system, Frolick also devotes considerable space to the process of building a new social identity for the post-divorce self.

To this end he includes chapters on how to decorate, dress, eat… more information than any frazzled new ex is capable of processing. How many divorce guides include background information about furniture design?

On the bright side, says Frolick, marriage/ divorce is one less societal hat we have to deal with, once it’s done. What begins as a kick in the head (the loss of identity, security, dignity) can lead to a more lasting and rewarding discovery: ourselves. The knowledge of which might help us make a decent go of it next time – with or without a marriage licence.