Illustration by A G Duffy

Dear Agony Editor,

Recently, I was speaking with a group of work colleagues about our creative pursuits. One person talked about being a musician, another brought up her photography. I said that I’d written two novels. “Boy, am I feeling unproductive!” another colleague laughed. “I need to get a hobby, too.” A hobby? She completely trivialized my craft. I want to address it with her, but I’m not sure if I’m being overly sensitive.

Signed,

Holly Hobbie

Dear Holly Hobbie,

Writing is something writers both control and don’t control. It’s a force all its own, a compulsion that isn’t always easy to explain or rationalize. It can be challenging for a writer to articulate why they write, or how they write, or even what they write. 

If writers have difficulties understanding their craft, imagine how hard it must be for a non-writer to understand it. There are all kinds of assumptions people make about what it’s like to be a writer. They can romanticize the writing life and picture a writer wearing a turtleneck and sitting in a snow-blanketed cabin, furiously banging away on their laptop – which, as we know, is false, because writers never wear turtlenecks. Or they can oversimplify writing as something that writers “do” without much effort or thought, like grabbing a few ingredients for dinner at the grocery store. 

Regardless, how someone perceives your writing and your writing life is beyond your control. I once had someone say to me, “It must be nice to sit at a desk all day and write.” I wanted to reply, “Actually, I occasionally get up to pour myself a glass of champagne.” People will form their opinions about you and that’s not your problem to solve. 

The only person you really need to answer to is yourself. You know the time, energy, passion, and thought that goes into your process. My advice is to let the comment go. You might end up causing more harm than good. Your ego got a bit bruised, which is something all writers deal with at one time or another. Sometimes, the best response is to simply pick up that champagne flute and carry on.